A Great Vegetarian Barbecue Dish

Eating vegetarian meat substitutes is a great way to reduce the cholesterol in your diet dramatically and many of the products produced by such companies as Worthington Foods, Loma Linda Foods and Boca offer vegetarian alternatives for a variety of meat products.  I'm in the hospital with a kidney stone and because of the surgery I had yesterday, I haven't eaten much all weekend and I'm starving.  When I get really hungry I crave a really unique vegetarian meal that is my wife's specialty.

Miss Sheila trained under two of the finest cooks I ever knew of--my grandmother and hers. She can hold her own with either of them and, although I would never have told either of them, she outdoes them on many things. Her original idea for barbecue Tender-bits(TM) is everybody's favorite for celebratory meals in the King household. Since Sheila has made me promise to outlive her, I made her teach me how to make her signature dish.

Barbecue Tender-Bits

Original Recipe by Sheila King

- Ingredients -

1. 2 Cans Loma Linda Tender-bits
2. Flour
3. Seasoned Salt
4. Oil
5. Bulls-Eye or KC Masterpiece BBQ Sauce

- Instructions -

1. Remove the top and bottom from both Tender-bit cans and press from the can. Drain the Tender-bits and halve or quarter each "bit" as you prefer.  I like mine larger, Sheila likes 'em quartered.
2. Put a quarter to half cup of flour in a large mixing bowl and toss in the Tender-bits.  Dust them thoroughly and lightly season with seasoned salt.
3. Just cover the bottom of a large frying pan or electric skillet in canola oil and heat..
4. Place floured "bits" into the oil and cook stirring twice till the outsides are crisp and turn golden brown.
5. Pour a bottle of barbecue sauce over the Tender-Bits and remaining oil.  With the flour that got into the oil along with the Tender-bits, the barbecue sauce will make a delicious gravy that will cover the vege-meat.  When the gravy begins to bubble, turn the heat down to keep the dish warm while you cook the rest of the meal.  This allows the Tender-bits to marinate in the barbecue gravy.

Setting:  These are our favorite side dishes to go along with Barbecue Tender-Bits

1. Mama's Southern Mashed Potatoes with a little garlic, butter and cream cheese
2. Broccoli with a bit of melted Velveeta Cheese
3. Salad finely chopped with Ranch Dressing
4. Honeymama's Whole Wheat Dinner Rolls (so good they don't even need butter)
5. Peach Cobbler with Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla Ice Cream

Where to Buy:

Barbecued Tender-Bits as God intended

This meal illustrates why all vegetarians are not emaciated skeletons. Many of us are quite substantial individuals.  Tender-Bits are a vegan meat substitute (for what meat I am not sure).  They work really well in Chinese dishes, however, though they aren't much like chicken.  They make a nice neutral meat-like garnish for spicy dishes and tangy sauces.  You can order them by the case on Amazon.com, from Loma Linda or or any regional Seventh Day Adventist book store or vegetarian food store (found in most Adventist college towns). 

Next time we make up a batch, I'll take a picture and post it here.  Till then, bon appetit.

* Did and done. As you can see even just half a can makes up a nice sized batch for two.  When we have the kids and their families over, Sheila makes two or three cans and when it's all done, there are never any leftovers.

Building the Box Dulcimer

Overview:

The handmade dulcimer is a simple first-time “real” musical instrument project. A dulcimer is a long, fretted instrument, designed to be strummed while sitting in your lap or on a table or stand. you play the tune with a small wooden stick pressed against the main string and slid up and down the frets while you strum. You can also pluck and chord the dulcimer with your fingers. Its simple shape and sit-on-top fretboard is easier to build than an instrument with a neck-mounted fretboard like a guitar. The version presented here is a box dulcimer, built in a rectangular shape. It's much easier to build since you don't have to warp the edges to match the traditional hourglass or teardrop shape. If you're a beginner to instrument-making this is your dulcimer.

Materials:

• 3 panels of instrument wood, 1/8’ thick by 18” by 23″
• 1 piece hardwood 1 ¼ inch by 1 1/2 inch by ¼ inch
• 1 piece hardwood, 1 ¼ inch by 2 5/8 inch by 3/8 inch
• 1 piece hardwood, 1/8 inch by 1 ¼ inch by ¼ inch
• Coping Saw
• Hole saw (drill attachment)
• Sabre Saw/Band Saw
• Wood Glue
• Drill and drill bit set
• 1 Very dense hardwood board, 1 ½ inch by ¾ inch by 28 inches for the fretboard
• 4 small screws, 1/8 inch by ¼ inch long
• Set of 4 dulcimer strings
• 4 single peg guitar machine heads (from music store)
• Box of extra large paper clips
• Bastard file
• Pencil
• Carpenter Square
• Electrical tape
• Wood stain and Varnish
• Fine bristle paintbrush
• Paint thinner

Step 1

Cut two pieces of 1/8 inch panel into a rectangle 6-inch wide by 23 inches long. These are the top and bottom pieces. Cut 4 one-inch diameter sound holes in the top piece. They can be any shape, but should be at least a half-inch from the edge and about 7 ½ inches from the heel and front of the top piece. Cut with a hole saw and sand the edges all around on the top.

Step 2
Cut two more strips of 1/8 inch panel 1 ½ inches wide by 23 inches long to make the sides of the rectangular box. Cut two strips of 1/8 panel also 1 ½ inches by 5 ¾ inches for the front and heel ends of the box. Assemble the box by gluing the heel and front strips and the side strips between the top and back panels to create a rectangular box. Set some books on top of the box till the glue cures and sets.

Step 3


This is the full length fretboard described here.

 Take the hardwood fingerboard. Measure five inches from one end. Mark the end of the fingerboard ½ inches from the bottom and draw a line on the side of the fretboard from the mark on the neck to where the half inch line touches the edge of the end of the fingerboard. Trim the end of the fingerboard so it slopes downward from the 5 inch mark to the end of the fretboard. This is where you will install the tuning pegs. This is the headstock.

The headstock can also be extended past the end of the box as shown below to allow you to install standard banjo or guitar tuning pegs. The fretboard wood is 28 inches to allow you to construct a proper headstock if you want.  You can also cut off the fretboard to the length of the box and attach tuning pegs at the end as shown in the short fretboard below.  I like the longer version with banjo or individual machine heads.  They seem to hold their tune better than friction pegs.  Simply drill holes in the headstock for the four tuning pegs you'll need and screw them in place as shown.  If you elect to build a three string dulcimer, you only have to install three tuning pegs.  I prefer the doubled melody string with two single drones.

Step 4

This dulcimer has an extended carved headstock

Measure 1 ½ inches form the heel of the fingerboard. Measure 4 more inches. Use the band saw to cut a shallow 3/8 inch deep dip in the fretboard for a strumming hole.

Step 5
Cut two bridges from hardwood. The one for the heel should be 1 ½ inches wide, 1 ¼ inches tall by ¼ inches thick. The second is 1/8 inch thick by 1 ½ inch by ¼ inch tall.



This is an alternate short fretboard with a gap for strumming

 Step 6
Glue the fretboard to the top of the box in the center so that the heel end is 1 ¼ inches from the heel of the box. You will have to calculate where to glue the bridge before you mark and set it.  The fret calculator link in step 9 should help you figure out how far apart to place the bridge at the lower end.  The nut as the bridge-like structure at the top of the fretboard by the tuner machine heads is properly called is glued to the top of the fretboard and the frets are calculated from the nut (step 9). When the bridge has set (24 hours) glue the heel bridge into place at the end of the box. When that sets, glue the 1 ¼ inch by 2 5/8 inch by 3/8 inch hardwood square to the heel of the fretboard over the bridge and end of the box to create a heel plate for attaching the string holder screws. Cut a 1/8 inch wide groove 1/8 inch deep into the bridge below the headstock where the fingerboard begins to taper toward the end. Glue the second bridge into the groove and let it set.

Step 7
Drill two 1/16 inch holes ¼ inch in diagonally each of the top corner so of the hardwood heel plate. Drill two more pilot holes ½ inch diagonally toward the center from the lower corners of the heel plate. Screw the four small screws into the 4 holes with enough of the heads protruding to wrap a string loop around.

Step 8
Stain and varnish the box end of the instrument and peg head and allow finish to cure and set. Drill four holes in the head stock the size called for in the instructions for setting the guitar tuner pegs. Set the pegs with the keys down and the wire holes sticking up.

Step 9

Calculate the spacing of the frets. You can use an on-line fret calculator or buy a fret spacing guide from several different sources. To determine where to mark the spaces for the frets on the fretboard, measure from the top bridge down the fretboard toward the heel. Cut a groove just narrower than the width of the paper clip wire you are using along each fret mark. Straighten the paper clip wire and tap the wires into the fret grooves, so that the top of the wire extends slightly above the fretboard where each fret was marked. Clip off and file smooth the ends of the fret wires. You can also buy fret wire from a musical supply store to use instead of paper clips.

Step 10
Cut a set of shallow grooves in the top of the bridges. Measure the spacing with the dulcimer peg head to your left if you are right handed or vice versa if you are left. Mark the first groove at ¼ inch, the second at 3/8 inches. This will pair the first or melody string. The middle drone string groove should be marked at ¾ inch and the bass drone string at 1/1/4 inch from the bottom of the bridge.

Step 11
Loop the strings over the screws on the heel of the fretboard. Run the strings through the grooves on the bridges and affix them to the tuning pegs. Tighten and tune the strings to the tuning you’ve chosen to play. There are many different tunings. Standard D tuning for the Dulcimer is: 1st String (bass) D, 2nd String (middle) A, 3rd String and 4th String (melody strings) A.


Summary:
This type of dulcimer is also called a "church" dulcimer. If you'd rather buy one, check out the Mountain Made Music Website where they have a pretty little church dulcimer for about $250.  You can also buy kits and printed plans for various types of dulcimers.  I borrowed pics from several box dulcimer makers to show what one looks like. As soon as I've built my dulcimer, I'll put step by step construction pictures on here.

Links:

Mountain Made Dulcimer
http://www.mountainmademusic.com/default.asp

Osborne A Telier: Building a Mountain Dulcimer
http://www.osborneatelier.com/Dulcimer_01.htm

Folkcraft Instruments: Mountain Dulcimer Building Supplies - Plans And Instructions
http://www.folkcraft.com/p_1482_cat_7000321_hdr_7000336_sort_cattitle_pg_1.html

Quazen: How to Make a Dulcimer
http://quazen.com/recreation/crafts/how-to-make-a-dulcimer/

Howdy Ya Dewit: How to Tell if A Piece of Wood Will Make a Good Musical Instrument
http://howdyyadewit.blogspot.com/2010/08/how-to-tell-if-piece-of-wood-will-make.html

Doug Sparling: Fret Calculator
http://www.dougsparling.com/software/fretcalc/index.php

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Organize Your Coupon Book

Coupon Book Labels for the Nonfanatic

The wife recycled a picture album yesterday to use as a keeper book for her grocery store coupons.  With her disability keeping her out of the workforce, she's decided to at least take a stab at using coupons to cut our grocery bill.  The Queen of Organization came to me to print some labels for her coupon book.  She brought me a list of labels, one for each page in the book (22 pages total - 11 front and back).

She wondered if I could "...make them up on the computer." Once you earn a reputation for being able to do "anything on the computer", the family sends you all sorts of clerical projects.  Since I'm very busy, I did a quick and dirty job of it with Microsoft Word.

Now, I could have gone more elaborate.  Instead I went with a quick MS Word mailmerge.  I may come back to the project later if she sticks with the coupon thing long term and I'll post the prettified version in its place.  She wants me to fix up a larger ex-dayplanner, but I'll have to buy the plastic storage pages at Office Depot, so that will have to wait.  When we get it, I'll do the whole thing up on PageMaker with borders and little pictures and  make it really nice.


For now, though I'm posting the printable label page as a PDF file here.  Click on the link and the page will open in Adobe Reader.  You can also click on the title of this article and it'll do the same thing.  Then simply insert an AVERY 8460 address label or compatible generic label sheet into your printer and print it.  Then it's just peel and stick.  It leaves a few blank ones if you collect coupons for auto parts or sporting goods or something else we forgot.

Have fun with the coupons. I once saved about $40 on groceries with just an hour invested in coupon hunting, so it does work pretty well.  Unfortunately, I have the attention-span of a jackrabbit on a date, so I'm leaving coupon hunting to the wife.  She's good at stuff that requires organization.